Attending to the Word “How” and How It Works

By Jeff Copper, MBA, PCC, PCAC, CPCC, ACG – July 15, 2024

The word “how” is an interesting word when you think about it. “How” can be used as a noun, a conjunction, an idiom, or an adverb. As an attention coach, I use “how” as an adverb. Adverbs work as adjectives to modify verbs. For example, “How do I pay attention to something?” To illustrate, let’s substitute “attend” as the verb in the following sentence: “How does one address the president?” becomes, “How does one attend to the president?”

Paying attention to “how” in this manner makes sense. If you ask how to repair something (a computer, lawnmower, or flat tire),  aren’t you asking how to pay attention to it or what sequence of steps should be focused on to repair the item?

As a coach, I’m interested in how individuals work. Frankly, I’m amazed how few people actually understand how they work. To me, if you don’t know how you work, then how can you figure out how to move yourself forward?

This brings us to a second interesting point about “how.” To me, there are two kinds of “how”: methodical how and insightful how. Methodical how is a series of steps that produce an outcome. A Facebook follower of mine calls it “buttonology.”

Think of it like this: You can push 8, then 4, then 2 on a calculator, then hit the divide button, then the 1 and 3 buttons followed by the equals sign, and get the answer to a long-division problem. But what if you don’t have a calculator? If you don’t have the insight on how long division works (so that you can do it by hand), do you really know how long division works? Or does it mean you merely know how to execute a series of steps?

Are you starting to see why I think “how” is such an interesting word? “How” directs attention to what works. As an attention coach, I focus on insightful how. Most people are stuck because they are paying attention to the wrong how… the methodical how. Most don’t realize this, especially those with ADHD.

Consider this: just because you can operate all the remote controls in your house doesn’t mean you can do it in someone else’s house if they are using another system, like satellite TV, for example. Your methodical sequence of steps doesn’t work in other environments. In these situations, the key to success is to pay attention to the insightful how because it enables you to repair things even when the tools change. Insightful how is about understanding why things work as they do.

In a similar way, I’ve seen those with ADHD attempt in a methodical way to apply an organizational solution, that is, one that works for those who don’t have ADHD. But it doesn’t work for them. Why? Because their brain doesn’t work the same way!

Now, can you see that this relates back to coaching? Most people think they have a sense for how they work. In reality, they are paying attention to methodical how. How do you know? Well, it’s like they are stuck at another house with no clue how to watch TV, much less turn it on. When I’m coaching individuals, I’m focusing on insightful how, not some off-the-shelf do-it-yourself solution peddled at most bookstores.

So, the next time you’re stuck, pause and acknowledge that you may have no idea how you work. Then begin to pay attention to how you work from an insightful perspective. I’ll give you a hint on how to accelerate the process: Focus on what works! You’ve already proven that whatever doesn’t work doesn’t work, so you don’t have to try to prove it again and again.

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