By Jeff Copper, MBA, PCC, PCAC, CPCC, ACG – May 20, 2024
Those with ADHD often go through life with challenges that make them feel like they’re living in a maze where there’s an obstacle at every turn. But there is hope, because we now have a way to shed some light on what’s holding them back. Through a special lens I’ve developed over many years, we can look at our thoughts and beliefs to see what’s actually there. It’s called AttentionScope® and it’s incorporated into my new systematic program, Cognitive Ergonomics from the Inside Out™. Continue reading “Understanding the Workings of Our ADHD Brains”
Students, whether they’re teenagers, adolescents, or young adults in college, need to have their own goals, their own reasons to succeed, which really leads to whether they are motivated. Sometimes this means they need professional help, and coaching is an effective means to help them move forward because research is showing that coaching has a positive impact. However, there is a caveat. Are they coachable? Meaning, are they ready for coaching? That’s a very important question, because the answer apparently is, no, they are not all ready for coaching. 
As an ADHD and attention coach, I frequently have individuals come to me for coaching because they are not getting the outcome they want. The majority of the time they are “stuck” because they are paying attention to how they believe something works (or how they believe it is supposed to work).
“If we weren’t all crazy, we would go insane” ~ Jimmy Buffet. That’s right; we’re all a little crazy in our own way, especially those with ADHD. All too often, ADD-ers get caught up in the seriousness of life. Most could use a little humor to lighten things up, and the ability to laugh at themselves is something we should aspire to just to take off some of the pressure. 
Frustrated by your weaknesses? Why not look at the opposite end of the spectrum?
What is stigma? How does it impact ADHD? Is it different from discrimination? How is it different and what are its properties? Does language play a role in stigma? How can we overcome stigma? In this blog post, I’m looking into the concept of stigma to unravel its layers and explore its implications… especially regarding its impact on ADHD. 
I’m a fan of what I call insightful thinking, and I’m sharing a simple example that I think beautifully illustrates the difference between insightful thinking and methodical thinking as a way to help delineate the different types of problem-solving strategies. Let’s begin by defining a few terms so we are paying attention to the same thing.
Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder is confusing and key ADHD symptoms are often misunderstood in relationships. One of the patterns that couples fall into that is damaging for them is that they don’t understand the symptoms as they’re expressed in the relationship.
Life in a family of five where they all have ADHD can be a unique and challenging experience. The dynamics in such a family are often characterized by high energy levels, impulsivity, and difficulty with focus and organization. With everyone sharing similar traits, there may be a sense of understanding and empathy within the family, as they can relate to each other’s struggles. But it can also lead to chaos and frustration, as it might be harder to maintain routines and responsibilities. 
As an ADHD and attention coach, I’m often asked what works for those with ADHD. So, I want to dive into that, but I also want to explore what doesn’t work. First, it’s essential to understand that everyone’s experience with ADHD is unique, so what works for one person may not work for another. But in general, the key to success is finding strategies that support the individual’s strengths and challenges.
Have you ever meditated and noticed your mind wandering? Congratulations, you’re meditating correctly. You might be wondering, “What does meditation have to do with my ADHD?” The answer is in a paradigm shift, because meditation is all about paying attention to your attention! It’s like a workout for your mind, helping you become more aware of the present moment and improving your ability to control what you focus on. 
The placebo effect has been documented to positively impact physical and mental health. How can this be? After all, a placebo is benign. It’s a sham or simulated intervention designed to produce a perceived or actual improvement. Many times, a placebo is used to reinforce a person’s expectation of getting well or moving forward. Studies show this phenomenon is pervasive. But, if a placebo is benign, how can it have positive effects? I’m calling this to your attention as evidence of the power of what you pay attention to. 
I’d like to share an old parable used by Mark Twain that I feel illustrates the dangers of searching for, or succumbing to, the control of others regarding what you should do in life.
Get ready to get ready to go? How can that concept help manage time for those with ADHD? How can it help them manage transitions? First, we need to understand the concept.
As we age, we have memory loss, and hormonal changes present some attention deficit symptoms. This can get confusing. So, how can you tell the difference between ADD symptoms and age or hormonal changes? It’s a tough question. But the ADDiva, Linda Roggli (
“If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.” Isn’t that what they say? But trying harder is impossible if you are already trying as hard as you can and getting no results. So, what can you do?
ADHD is an issue of self-regulation. As an ADHD and attention coach, I know that many of the tips, tricks, and strategies on the Web don’t typically work for those with ADHD. Often, these tips tell you there is a logic behind using a weakness to overcome a weakness, but this sets you up for failure. And that’s why good ideas or good solutions don’t work in the world of ADHD.
Jane, a woman with attention deficit disorder (ADD), came to coaching, wanting help with organization, specifically, getting things done. So, we focused our work on paying attention to what she pays attention to. Now, understand that this means we focused on her natural tendencies and habits, not necessarily on what she was consciously thinking of.
ADHD relationships can spiral out of control and end up in hurtful conversations. Is that an outcome you will really want? How do you stop these interactions that only end up damaging your relationships? Once the damage is done, how do you repair or rebuild the trust? It’s not just by saying you’ll do better or you’ll try harder. You really have to get at the dynamics of the relationship and then work to understand each other. That’s what you need to develop conflict intimacy. 
The first written record of the concept of ADHD coaching was in the book, Driven to Distraction, by Dr. Ned Hallowell and Dr. John Ratey in 1994. Little did they know at that time, the entire coaching industry would grow into a new ADHD intervention. In the late 1990s, a handful of individuals became life coaches that had ADHD and began touting the concept. In 2004, we saw the official formation of the ADHD Coaches Organization (ACO) as a means for coaches to come together and share best practices and competencies. 
What is it like for someone with ADHD when their executive functioning brain is being taxed and becomes a distraction? It’s like starting the task all over again. If you have ADHD, it’s just like rebooting your laptop; you have to reboot your brain. That’s why I’m using a computer as a metaphor to understand what happens when you get distracted while engaged in an activity that requires your executive functioning brain. 
What is insightful thinking, and why should it be understood as an alternative to methodical thinking or other problem-resolution strategies? Insight, or insightful thinking, is the sudden and immediate comprehension or understanding that takes place without overt trial-and-error testing. 
Dr. Russell Barkley (
Just as a physical activity requires exercise on a regular basis to develop a skill, ADHD requires attention exercise to develop attention skills. With that in mind, I’m sharing a cool tip with you that correlates physical exercise and attention exercise. 
These days, there is so much competition for our attention. At times, it can feel like we are pulled in a hundred directions with all different mediums vying for emotional control of our hearts and minds (and let’s be honest, our wallets). It can feel overwhelming. 
When you’re observing someone else, it can be easy to make judgments and describe who they are and what they do. When you have to turn the tables on yourself, particularly if you have ADHD, it can be challenging. This is especially true if you are a creative type or a problem solver.
Many with ADHD are stuck applying the obvious solution as if they are the same as everyone else. The bottom line is this: Those who are diagnosed with ADHD have brains that are just wired differently.
Do you control what you pay attention to? Think about it! On the one hand, we have politicians, marketers, and corporate America all fighting to gain control of what we pay attention to for their own self-serving benefit. On the other hand, we have our pets, friends, parents, kids, and significant others all desperately vying for us to pay attention to them. Let’s face it, paying attention is hard work! It takes effort… and lots of it. 
Athletes who have ADHD often suffer from psychological issues such as depression or anxiety and other emotional challenges that stem from ADHD. These athletes may experience less than ideal performance on the playing field. As an ADHD and attention coach, this topic is significant as I coach sports players who suffer from symptoms of ADHD in their performance, both on the field and off.
During the COVID pandemic, many people had no recourse but to work from home. Unfortunately, they struggled with getting things done and their productivity declined, perhaps for one simple reason. There’s no one around to take off some of the stress on your working memory. The home environment is much different from the workplace where others are around and are readily available for interaction. So, working at home means you often don’t have an accountability partner. 
Knowing what works for attention deficit hyperactivity disorder is just as important as knowing what does not work. Some of the tactics you use might not be helping. In fact, they might even exacerbate your symptoms. For example, pressure to perform based on other people’s ideas of how you should perform almost always leads to failure because it doesn’t work and it’s detrimental. For those with ADHD, doing things that do not fit their natural way of doing things can often paralyze them at most and at least inhibit their performance. 
Organizing things is a real challenge, especially for those with ADHD. They think they’ll just jump in and start organizing until they get into a mess and then things seem to explode.
Time and again, I have written about attention, and time and again, I have tried to illustrate that whatever seems to be obvious to you is a function of what you are paying attention to. So, if you want to pay attention to the right thing, then you need to pay attention to how things work by focusing on the process, not the result. To demonstrate that I really do practice what I preach, I will share with you an experience of how I put these principles into play a few days ago in my own life. 
Since the early 19th century ushered in the Industrial Revolution, we as a society have evolved from a one-size-fits-all way of doing things to a more highly customizable system of producing consumer goods. Now, humankind itself is finally starting to develop a better understanding of, and appreciation for, the diverse makeup of its people. More and more advocates are focusing on differences in ethnicity, sexuality, and gender. When it comes to neurodiversity, however, for the most part, many are still silent.
In preparing for ADHD Awareness Month in 2014, I realized that ADHD coaching first appeared in print in the book Driven to Distraction by Dr. Ned Hallowell and Dr. John Ratey. This book has been the best-selling book on ADHD of all time. To bring awareness to the public, I reached out to Dr. Ned Hallowell. Together, we did a podcast on Attention Talk Radio, acknowledging the 20th anniversary of the birth of ADHD coaching as an intervention.
If you’ve got ADHD and truly observe your behavior, you might come to realize that thinking is effortful. It’s very challenging for people with ADHD to actually pause and engage their thinking mind to override their automatic responses. There is value in doing that if you actually make that happen. 
In the context of ADHD, do your eyes glaze over when you start talking about digital means and methods? If so, I’m here to say that the cloud can set you free. So, let’s talk about what I mean by “the cloud.”
Organizing your miscellaneous thoughts and ideas? UGH! The topic of getting organized comes up frequently in coaching, and I can relate to that personally. For instance, there’s a miscellaneous drawer in my kitchen. It’s the depository for things that don’t have a home. The top drawer of my bedroom chest serves the same purpose. Ditto my workbench in the garage. 
What is self-awareness? Is it just being aware of your own internal emotions and feelings? Is it being able to see yourself in the third person? Or is it being able to see life and situations at a higher level, not just awareness of yourself, but awareness of others? Many people with ADHD struggle with self-awareness.
In my talks, podcasts, and videos, I relate information and helpful advice on various topics concerning ADHD and attention. From time to time, I receive comments and questions from folks disagreeing with what I say, because they “feel” what they are doing works for them.